Baby Steps at 60+mph

I came back from a fantastic trip to Universal Studios, most of which was spent in The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.  I won't go into the maudlin aspects of what being there meant to me, nor the utter geeking out that occurred as I weaved my way through a pseudo-Hogsmeade and Hogwarts, pretending that I was something more than ordinary, something more than human, something more than me.

However, the trip allowed me a chance to put my new philosophy to the test.  I've always been "okay" with roller coasters, but I hate, hate, hate upside down loop-de-loops.  I went on The Zydeco Scream (from good old Jazzland!) when I was a kid and thought I was going to die, or something equally overly dramatic.

But I'm learning that I can't live my life in fear and maybe miss out on awesome experiences because I'm too scared to do something.  I know there will come a time when I won't be able to overcome my fears, or that some fears are legitimate enough to the point where I really shouldn't attempt to overcome them, but roller coasters seemed like a good start for me.

So I hemmed and hawed my way through the first line and got all of my nervous energy out through babbling and jittery legs.  They strapped me in, and off I went!

And I loved it.

I loved it!  It was exhilarating, exciting, and ultimately, freeing.  There was another roller coaster at a separate park that takes riders up at a 90 degree angle, drops them from there, and goes crazy with upside-downing and loop-de-looping for the whole length of the park.  The first time I saw it, I took one look and say NO.  But as the day went on, I managed to talk myself into going on it for the simple reason that there was a small chance that I might love it.  And why would I deny myself the opportunity to experience something that I love?  Even if I wound up hating it, I would be able to say that I knew I hated it for a fact, not a speculation.

So I went on it, and while I didn't love it, I didn't hate it.  I didn't die, throw up, faint, or anything that my fear-clouded brain told me would probably happen.  I actually went on it twice, just to make sure my fear was conquered.

Guess I can say I'm pretty proud of myself.  It's not a huge victory, but that doesn't diminish the victory itself.  Roller coasters aren't really one of my paralyzing fears, like the ocean or extreme heights, but I definitely was afraid of them to a degree.  I'm mostly just proud of myself for being able to look at the fear, challenge it head-on, and not only be successful in challenging it, but finding out that I actually like it.  Nothing to be afraid of.

Onward in my quest to shine light on all the dark areas that fear wants to inject in my life!